Hey again!

Remember how we called bullsh*t on the current cultural admonition to “just be present”?

Here’s why:

Because of how the brain works, and unless we’re staying in deep meditation with no other requirements for living 24 hours a day and 7 days a week – Zen-mode isn’t actually possible 100% of the time. The Law of Functional Priority doesn’t allow it.

In terms of neural function, the Law of Functional Priority just means that:

If, given the brain’s current read of our internal energy budget and other resources available to us, it assesses our environs as potentially threatening to our survival – regardless of facts or truths about what’s going on around us or inside us – the brain itself will prioritize being in a Survival state. (FIGHT, FLIGHT, FREEZE, APPEASE!)

When we’re in a Survival state, the Emotional System (governing how we feel about things) and the Executive System (governing how present we can get) both shut down.

This is mostly because if we’re in danger of being eaten, it doesn’t matter how we feel about it, and it matters even less what we think, imagine, or can appreciate about it.

What does this imply for regular humans?

If dirty dishes send you into a Survival state – you absolutely can't sit still and enjoy your baby.

If your nervous system is sounding alarm bells – there is no possible, neurochemical way you can relax.

If your body is receiving any cues (real or imagined) of danger – no amount of gratitude can beat the cascade of stress chemicals and bring you back to the present.

In our opinion, it’s actually unkind to pretend that presence and relaxation are available to someone, when they simply are not. We've built a whole school around this!

If you, or anyone you know, wants to join us and learn how to get out of Survival Mode and have a chance at being present – wonderful!

If not, then we encourage you to at least give yourself some compassion.

There is nothing wrong with you. Likely your nervous system learned to be on the lookout for danger (and it was right to learn that because you needed to stay safe) and now the Law of Functional Priority means that you can't be on the lookout for danger and also be relaxing in the present moment at the same time.

When you have experienced any amount of trauma, it takes a lot more than intention, good luck, and a bath to actually be present in your own life.

If you want to know how to work your brain so you can be more present – we’ve got you covered.

We're with you. Rooting for you.

Love,

Natalie and Nathan