Felicitations!
We hope your Spring is unfolding just right for you. We have some green coming back into our landscape! What changes are you enjoying in your season?
We're feeling major thankfulness for the green to ease our transition back from the tropical climes of Mexico to the northern latitudes of Montana!
Our family trip was phenomenal. Which doesn't mean we felt only bliss – no way! But we did set ourselves up for serious success by meeting our needs as much as possible in the lead up and each day. And, we did make time to process feelings every day, so we had room to follow our bliss, and so that even when things were uncomfy, we could draw comfort from emotional support.
Want some examples of this kind of vacationing?
You betcha!
Money Planning
Needs met: Predictability, Ease, Reassurance, Security, Safety, Fun, and more.
One of the coolest things we did was set aside money, every month, so that by the time our feet hit the ground in Mexico the whole trip (including spending money while we were there) was already paid for. This meant that we pulled out enough pesos for the week as soon as we arrived, and never gave money a second thought. What a fun relief!
With our wad of pesos we slipped into a taxi that took us to a tiny beach. From there we walked down a rickety, twisty, missing-planks "pier" and got into a tiny boat that was co-captained by a 10-year old.
Off we went for 30 minutes, over 6-foot waves.
Nearly drenched and smiling with wonder we arrived at a tiny, remote village.
Info Gathering and Sharing
Needs met: Information, Communication, Connection, Knowing, Learning, Faith, and more.
We read so much before we left! We watched Youtube videos about navigating "The Shark Tank" – the corridor of aggressive timeshare salespeople that you must pass through on your way out of the Puerto Vallarta airport. We scoured the welcome emails our host sent us. We read blog posts from 2012! And we passed all of this information on to our kids so that they were prepared and knew what to expect each step of the way.
We were also lucky that our friends arrived one day before us and relayed even more details. Heaven!
From the pier we walked up through the narrow streets of the pueblo (barely wide enough for a burro or an atv – zero cars!), winding past tiny shops, and restaurants, petting dogs, saying hi to cats, and out into the jungle, where we climbed 117, or 159 steps (depending on which kid you ask) until we got to "our place".
Help
Needs met: Support, Pleasure, Food, Pacing, Ease, Comfort, and more.
When our host asked if we wanted to pay a little more to have the fridge stocked before our arrival, we said, Yes!
When he also asked if we wanted dinner delivered on our first night, we also said, Yes!
The fridge and pantry had coffee, sugar, butter, eggs, cheese, fruit, milk, bread, juice, granola, guacamole, ceviche, banana pie, banana bread, cookies, and local chocolate. :)
That first night we lounged in hammocks with cats (ok, we did this every day, but it was especially delicious that first evening). Our friends came over, we ate local quesadillas and burritos, and we laughed until it was pitch-black, jungle dark.
Pace
Needs met: Freedom, Discovery, Grace, Agency, Autonomy, Healing, Time, and more.
We had one plan for the week – ride horses to the waterfall. Other than that, we were open to simply being in that location. We sat on a stone wall in town, swang in a hammock looking at a tree, dug in the sand, petted the town dogs, talked to a neighbor – just living.
Simplicity
Needs met: Rest, Appreciation, Authenticity, Beauty, Celebration, Enjoyment, Flexibility, Peace, and more.
The nature of this trip meant we only brought a backpack each. (Good thing, because we would have missed our connection after Customs if we hadn't been able to grab our carry-on and run!) We noted the lack of variety in our outfit options, but it felt amazing and adventurous to keep it simple.
The palapa where we stayed had basically no walls. No walls! The roosters started crowing at 5am, then the marine and tropical jungle birds kicked in at dawn, and then a group of giant brown pheasants that like to wrestle(?) and make a metallic screech, descended on the mango tree at around 7am. We didn't love every sound, but we loved being a part of it – right in the midst of the living world.
And with no plans and a slow pace it meant that we were still. We researched the loud birds, we read our books, we sipped our beverages, but a lot of the time we just sat and looked at the view.
Connection
Needs met: Empathy, Trust, Understanding, Support, Self-expression, Connection, Honesty, and more.
It's important to note, that within and between each of these scenic shots, were feelings!
At literally every turn, we were making space to co-process, both, our blissful and uncomfortable emotions.
Tears, hugs, empathy, and connection were needed around things like:
Mosquito bites
Blisters
The pace of someone else
The desire to not sit in a restaurant
The desire to sit in a restaurant
Beach chairs
Routes
A tarantula
A scorpion
Not being allowed to flush toilet paper (anywhere in the village!)
Having to leave
Missing people
Our friends departing
Smoky nachos
How much we liked it there
Colonialism
Capitalism
Racism
Tadpoles
Coatimundi
Belonging
Leaving
Trust
Needs met: Fun, Adventure, Play, Exploration, Novelty, Shared Experience, and more.
Upon our return we thanked our kids for being so "game" for this adventure, and they said, "We really trust you to take good care of us, so it was easy to just go for it.".
Gosh, that was wonderful to hear.
We're already pretty convinced, but it all seemed to underscore that when:
our needs are met
we get support around our feelings when our needs are not met
it's like having a passport to anywhere in the world. We have natural confidence, boldness, curiosity, adventurousness, and willingness to explore when we can trust that we will be taken care of, and/or trust that we will take good care of ourselves.
The simplicity of that is pretty compelling for us...
Thanks for coming along for this vacation recap!
We love having the opportunity to share with you because it gives us a good chance to reflect and note for ourselves what works for us and what doesn't! And we hope to offer you some inspiration, too!
We'd love to know, which needs stood out as important to you?
And,
What kind of adventure would you be capable of, and interested in, if your needs were met?
Much Love,
Natalie and Nathan
You May be New to the Center for Emotional Education
Here's what's coming up next:
Community Release Ritual
Monthly Opportunity to get help Expressing Emotion
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Dear EQ, What Do I Do?
Emotionally Intelligent Ideas for Life's Challenges
Monthly Support
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Complimentary "Feel Better Already" Strategy Session